Some old guy asked me to transcribe this note for you:

"Why, hello, young lady! I'm sorry, but I seem to have gotten lost. What is this lovely place? We never had electronically generated meeting places filled with drama when I was your age. We had to get on our dragons and make our own drama! But this poor old man is rambling again. Still, it's nice to find an easier way to talk with sexy young men. With their warm butts. And their sexy chests. And - I didn't say that. No, really. Look, a seagull!"

Then he smacked me with his walking stick for pretending that I knew how to write for him.