AJHSFL

Yesterday--

Dentist: So we're taking your teefs out.
Me: I have had time to mentally prepare. Let us be rid of them.
Dentist: Here, have some sedative that will get you through the procedure high as a kite and totally unconscious of what we're doing to you, but also fuck up your system until you can properly sleep it off.
Me: Okay.
Me: *wakes up*
Me: HURK
Me: *gets home*
Me: *manages a teaspoon of ice cream*
Me: HURK
Mom: *sympathy. also, total awareness of all implications of my plight.*

[Hours pass. Sedative is slept off.]

Me: I... can eat a bowl of ice cream! YAY.

[More hours pass.]

Me: Oh god I'm fucking starving. HEY, MASHED POTATOES.
Me: *om nom nom*
Me: Wow, I don't have a lot else to eat do I.

Today--

Mom: *goes to her own, somewhat less severe, dentist appointment, with niecechild in tow*
Mom: *stops at a dollar store and buys MULTITUDE OF CRUNCHY SNACKY THINGS LIKE CHIPS AND PICKLES AND CANDY AND COOKIES, ALL OF WHICH I WANT AND NONE OF WHICH I CAN EAT*
Niece and nephew: :DDDDDD
Me: SJKAHFJKHLGJKJDLG


Is Lyssie going to have to smack a bitch.