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Expecting Another p.o.s chapter
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ficbitch_anon)
I... it... agh, wtf kill.
So, chapter four of Expecting Another is up. And it is pain, my fellow bitches. It is pain. Time is a mere plaything in KawaiiJade's hands, logic and common sense are farther away from her story than ever before, and there's scarcely a comma to be seen.
But I wouldn't be a very good ficbitch if I ran screaming in horror now. So, here we go...
*Two Weeks Later*
"Ryo…uh I have to go for a little while."
Ryo looked up from his book. He was sitting on the couch in their living room. "Oh where are you going?" he asked saving his page in the book and paying full attention to his husband.
Ryou: Can you pick up some commas on the way home? We're fresh out.
"I have to go on an investigation case in Florida. I don't know when I'll be back. But here's a number you can call me at if any thing goes wrong." He handed Ryo a small piece of paper.
...FLORIDA?!
Why the FUCK does Dee, a detective living and working in NYC, have to go to FLORIDA? Isn't that kind of, I don't know, way the fucking hell out of the 27th's jurisdiction? It doesn't even make sense if you suppose he's pursuing somebody that *did* commit a crime in NYC, because then they could just alert the Florida police and... and... FUCK! *brain explodes*
They walked to the front door meeting Cal and Bikky. All hugs and kisses were exchanged. "Don't worry Dee I'll take care of Ryo and Bikky for you." Cal smiled.
Cal: I'll feed and walk them every day.
What the hell kind of lazy description is "all hugs and kisses were exchanged"?
Dee smiled too as the two love birds left for him to talk to Ryo alone. Dee hugged his lover then turned to leave. "But Dee?"
The dark haired man turned around. "Yeah?"
"What would you like the baby called?"
Dee smiled as he walked up to his husband. "I always liked the name Raven?"
Ryo hugged Dee. "I love it. Raven it is." He smiled pulling back.
...WTF. They did not just name their baby offhandedly as Dee's on the way out the door.
...TO FLORIDA.
Dee walked to the elevator with Ryo still in the hall. As he entered the elevator he said, "Don't worry Ryo I'll be back as soon as possible."
The doors closed, leaving Ryo alone in the hall. His head held low Ryo choked back a tear. "I'll be waiting here."
Tender farewell scene portrayed with depth and emotion and an actual good reason for leaving? Nahhh. KawaiiJade's too lazy for actual, you know, storytelling.
*One Month Later Ryo's Due Date*
"CAL!!!" yelled Ryo from his bedroom. Cal spent all of her time at Ryo's apartment since the news. She practically lived there at Ryo's feet. "CAL!!!" Ryo yelled again.
"She practically lived there at Ryo's feet". That gives me images of Ryou sprawled out on a chaise lounge, having Cal feed him grapes and fan him with palm leaves.
The red head young adult came running down the hall into Ryo's bedroom. The sight before her was shocking. Ryo sat at the edge of the bed wearing baggy pants and a white t-shirt which was soaked with blood near his mid section.
... Just answer me this. Where in the hell did that blood come from? And why BLOOD? Is the baby trying to burrow out of his stomach?
"Oh God is it time already?" Ryo nodded his head. Bikky came into the room behind her.
"Oh Shit. I'll call the hospital and get the bags. You get Ryo comfortable."
You know, I think that an exclamation point or two in there might be appropriate. As it is, they sound like robots.
And might I point out the incredible awkwardness of the top paragraph there? There is no line break to separate Cal's question from Ryou's response. And the use of 'her' when Cal is not referred to by name makes it sound like Ryou is female.
Though, in this fic, maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing. It would at least make the pregnancy physically possible.
Cal nodded as her boyfriend dialed the hospital. "Okay they said to come right away."
*dizzy* I think... did Bikky just have an entire telephone conversation between those two sentences?
*At the Hospital*
Ryo was carried into Bikky's arms as Cal stood behind them. "Oh God right away here Mr. MacLean." Called out there doctor as she led the way to Ryo's hospital room.
Ryou was carried... into Bikky's arms? Not only is that sentence constructed so that it sounds like they've just handed Ryou to Bikky, it wouldn't even make sense if it was grammatically correct. I know Bikky kind of shot up like a weed once he got into his teens, but I still don't think he's quite big enough to carry Ryou, especially not when Ryou's got so much extra weight on him.
... I can't even begin to count all the things wrong with that paragraph. Shall I just dump the whole vat of red ink on it?
"If you could wait out here we will begin the sea section." One of the nurses asked Bikky and Cal, pushing them gentle out of the room.
*rolls on the ground laughing* KawaiiJade, honey? It's C-section. You may think that looks lazy, (and pardon me for laughing hysterically at you if you do), but it's actually short for Caesarian section. Do you want to write all that out? Neither does anyone else. That's why it's called a C-section. It does not involve cutting a chunk out of the ocean.
Neeks said it best: "Ryou is giving birth to a DOLPHIN!" XD
Bikky struggled. "No I want to be there for my Dad. Is he going to be okay?"
The nurse didn't answer just continued to push Bikky out. Slamming the door shut Bikky and Cal were forced to go sit in front of the room. The blonde teenager was scared for his father and his new coming sister. He had been told that male pregnancy had a greater chance of not making it. Either the baby died and took the father with it or the father died leaving the helpless baby.
Attempt At Injecting Artificial Tension To Make Up For Shitty Storytelling: check.
You know, at no point has it ever been explained how Ryou's little assmiracle came to exist. It would be nice if we were actually told how it happened, and why the phenomenon seems to be widespread enough that Bikky can actually be told things about it.
...Wait, Bikky and Cal were forced to go sit in front of the room while they were slamming the door shut? KawaiiJade, writing is not a contest to see how many events you can jam into a short sentence.
*Dee*
"Come on Berkley we've caught the bad guy now let's go home." Dee protested.
Berkley glared at him. "You're right Dee we caught one bad guy. But there are many here. I'm sorry but I hate having to be here another month or two like you but we have a job to do."
WHY ARE THEY NOT LEAVING THIS TO THE FLORIDA POLICE? WHY ARE THEY EVEN HERE TO BEGIN WITH? PLEASE TELL ME THIS!
Sweet fishie fuck. It's illogical enough that Dee is there, but why is Berke there too? It's not like he's the commissioner of an entire precinct in New York, or anything.
...WHY ARE THEY IN FLORIDA?!
*Seven Hours after Ryo's Labor*
"I hope he's okay? Damn can we get any news?" growled Bikky. Cal sat next to her, leaning her head onto his lap.
I don't know, Bikky. Do you hope he's okay? You tell me.
Alternatively, KawaiiJade could remove that first question mark.
Then a nurse came into the hall. "Congratulations…Randy is okay. He's sleeping. You can see the baby if you like. Follow me." The female nurse showed Bikky and Cal to the room. The blonde automatically went to Ryo's side. Cal walked over to the baby and smiled. The nurse left the two a while ago.
You know something? Normally I have a high capacity to withstand awkward and nonsensical writing. A lot of incomprehensible sentences go unnoticed by me because I understood what the author meant to say.
I can't do that with this one. I'm left here futilely trying to decipher what KawaiiJade meant by "The nurse left the two a while ago". The sentence on its own is somewhat comprehensible, but in that paragraph it just doesn't gel.
"Aww…she's so cute." Smiled Cal. And as if on cue the baby opened her eyes to reveal emerald orbs shining up at her. "She's just like her father…" Bikky looked up at her. "…um…she looks like Dee."
Shining emerald orbs. Neeks, I think you're right - she's an ickle baby Mary Sue.
"It's too bad that Dee couldn't be here."
*Two Years later -Dee-*
WHAT?
Okay, this is just wrong. This man lives and works in New York. It is completely unreasonable and ridiculous to force him to randomly run off to solve a case in ANOTHER STATE, and especially so to make him stay there for TWO YEARS!
"COME ON PEOPLE I WANNA GO HOME!!" Dee yelled. He had been on this stupid undercover thing for a long time. He hadn't been able to reach Ryo like he said. "I'M NOT STAYING ANOTHER MINUTES HERE!!"
Even though I rather agree with Dee's sentiments, I must ask... who the fuck is he yelling at?
*Ryo, Bikky, Cal, and two year old Raven*
"I'm not cleaning that up." Stated Bikky, eyeing the pink vomit on the carpet, left by his younger sister.
You know, I didn't think too hard about that before, but pink vomit is probably not the number one sign of a healthy baby. Ryou might want to takeMary Sue Raven to the doctor.
Ryo sighed. "Please I have to go to work. Cal will come back from the grocery store to help you take care of her."
Bikky nodded cleaning up the mess. When Ryo came back into the room he stopped at the doorway. Bikky sat Indian style on the floor with Raven standing on his lap. The ebony haired toddler pulled on Bikky's blonde locks. "Hey…" Bikky smiled as Raven took her pink in his hand. "…you know Cal's right you do look like Dee."
So what you're trying to say is that Raven Sue physically took the color pink from herself and put it in Bikky's hand.
Ryo backed away, resting against the wall. Bikky sighed. "Even though how much I hate it…I wish Dee was here. Yeah you would love him. He's tough and…" Bikky continued to chant about Dee.
Cue disturbing mental image of Bikky wearing robes and saying incantations over a bubbling cauldron, right about... now.
Ryo smiled. He knew Bikky and Dee had a special thing and now his blonde son was sharing it with his little sister. Ryo turned down towards the front door. "I wish Dee was here." He choked back a tear, pulling his jacket over his body. "I'm leaving Bikky."
"He knew Bikky and Dee had a special thing"...
I won't even say it. It hurts my mind too much to even ponder.
*Two Years Later Raven's 4th Birthday*
"Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to Raven…happy birthday to you."
Everyone clapped as the long haired four year old blew out her candles. "Here Raven…I got this for you. Hope you like it." Cal handed the girl a pink box.
The young girl's eyes grew big as she held up the white tank dress with sunflowers on it. "Dad look what Cal gave me." She smiled facing Ryo.
"Wow that's beautiful."
Please note - we must constantly describe what Raven looks like, what she got for a birthday present, and the color of the box it was in. This is just about more description than we've gotten in the entire rest of the fic. Because Raven Sue is SPECHUL.
"Can I put it on?" she asked.
Ryo loved the look in his daughter's eyes. They were filled with love and happiness. Only if Ryo could feel the same way. Dee, his Dee had been gone for four years. He missed everything. Ryo's, pregnancy, Raven being born, he first words, her first steps, Dee had missed the first of everything. If Ryo had heard from Dee since he left is spirits would be brightened a little but he hadn't so they just sunk down low.
OMG! Look! COMMAS! I was beginning to think they were an extinct species! But they're in all the wrong places.
And this paragraph might actually almost be touching, if it were better written and if there were any good flipping reason at all for Dee to have been away for four years IN FLORIDA.
"Maybe later."
"Okay." She put the dress back. Cal sat in Bikky's arms, a diamond engagement ring on her finger. Bikky had proposed to her just three weeks ago. Ryo was happy for the two. He knew it would happen sooner or later but the surprise was still overwhelming.
Ryou: I knew you two were eventually gonna shack up, but I'm just overwhelmed with surprise that you're ENGAGED!
I don't think 'surprise' is the word we should use there.
Then suddenly the hone rang. "I'll get it." Ryo offered already reaching for the phone. "Just keep opening your presents Raven."
The little girl nodded as her father entered the other room to take the call. "Hello?"
A sigh. "Oh God it's good to hear your voice again Ryo."
Ryo almost dropped the phone from the familiar voice on the other line. "Dee? Oh God are you okay? Where are you? Oh I've missed you so much…when are you coming home?"
A slight chuckle. "Calm down baby. I'm in Boston. My flight is coming in tomorrow."
"Oh God Dee you're…" Ryo couldn't finish the sentence to shocked and happy.
I'm not sure I can finish the fic to pained and angry.
"That's right Ryo baby. I'm coming home."
Okay! How much do y'all wanna bet that when Dee comes back home next chapter, everything will be fine, his relationship with Ryou will be fully intact, Raven will accept him without a fuss, and it'll be just like he never even left? Even though he's been away from home and out of contact with the family for four years? Gaaahh.
KJ: Sorry for the long wait I really do. I've been real busy but not too busy for my fans. They're what's important right? Hope you liked this chapter enough to review it. Hope you look for the next chapter. And I promise that it won't take this long. Ja'ne!!
Let's the speaking Engrish! Let's the reviewbeg and egomasturbate for big happy!
How long did this chapter take, a week? If people are seriously complaining about the wait between chapters, I am absolutely flabbergasted. If anything, KawaiiJade should be apologizing for chucking her story at us so soon. It could have done with an extra, say, year or five; either for planning, or to get KawaiiJade time to grow up a bit and learn a bit about how to write.
At this point, I pray for nothing more than the swift end of this fic.
ficbitch_anon)I... it... agh, wtf kill.
So, chapter four of Expecting Another is up. And it is pain, my fellow bitches. It is pain. Time is a mere plaything in KawaiiJade's hands, logic and common sense are farther away from her story than ever before, and there's scarcely a comma to be seen.
But I wouldn't be a very good ficbitch if I ran screaming in horror now. So, here we go...
*Two Weeks Later*
"Ryo…uh I have to go for a little while."
Ryo looked up from his book. He was sitting on the couch in their living room. "Oh where are you going?" he asked saving his page in the book and paying full attention to his husband.
Ryou: Can you pick up some commas on the way home? We're fresh out.
"I have to go on an investigation case in Florida. I don't know when I'll be back. But here's a number you can call me at if any thing goes wrong." He handed Ryo a small piece of paper.
...FLORIDA?!
Why the FUCK does Dee, a detective living and working in NYC, have to go to FLORIDA? Isn't that kind of, I don't know, way the fucking hell out of the 27th's jurisdiction? It doesn't even make sense if you suppose he's pursuing somebody that *did* commit a crime in NYC, because then they could just alert the Florida police and... and... FUCK! *brain explodes*
They walked to the front door meeting Cal and Bikky. All hugs and kisses were exchanged. "Don't worry Dee I'll take care of Ryo and Bikky for you." Cal smiled.
Cal: I'll feed and walk them every day.
What the hell kind of lazy description is "all hugs and kisses were exchanged"?
Dee smiled too as the two love birds left for him to talk to Ryo alone. Dee hugged his lover then turned to leave. "But Dee?"
The dark haired man turned around. "Yeah?"
"What would you like the baby called?"
Dee smiled as he walked up to his husband. "I always liked the name Raven?"
Ryo hugged Dee. "I love it. Raven it is." He smiled pulling back.
...WTF. They did not just name their baby offhandedly as Dee's on the way out the door.
...TO FLORIDA.
Dee walked to the elevator with Ryo still in the hall. As he entered the elevator he said, "Don't worry Ryo I'll be back as soon as possible."
The doors closed, leaving Ryo alone in the hall. His head held low Ryo choked back a tear. "I'll be waiting here."
Tender farewell scene portrayed with depth and emotion and an actual good reason for leaving? Nahhh. KawaiiJade's too lazy for actual, you know, storytelling.
*One Month Later Ryo's Due Date*
"CAL!!!" yelled Ryo from his bedroom. Cal spent all of her time at Ryo's apartment since the news. She practically lived there at Ryo's feet. "CAL!!!" Ryo yelled again.
"She practically lived there at Ryo's feet". That gives me images of Ryou sprawled out on a chaise lounge, having Cal feed him grapes and fan him with palm leaves.
The red head young adult came running down the hall into Ryo's bedroom. The sight before her was shocking. Ryo sat at the edge of the bed wearing baggy pants and a white t-shirt which was soaked with blood near his mid section.
... Just answer me this. Where in the hell did that blood come from? And why BLOOD? Is the baby trying to burrow out of his stomach?
"Oh God is it time already?" Ryo nodded his head. Bikky came into the room behind her.
"Oh Shit. I'll call the hospital and get the bags. You get Ryo comfortable."
You know, I think that an exclamation point or two in there might be appropriate. As it is, they sound like robots.
And might I point out the incredible awkwardness of the top paragraph there? There is no line break to separate Cal's question from Ryou's response. And the use of 'her' when Cal is not referred to by name makes it sound like Ryou is female.
Though, in this fic, maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing. It would at least make the pregnancy physically possible.
Cal nodded as her boyfriend dialed the hospital. "Okay they said to come right away."
*dizzy* I think... did Bikky just have an entire telephone conversation between those two sentences?
*At the Hospital*
Ryo was carried into Bikky's arms as Cal stood behind them. "Oh God right away here Mr. MacLean." Called out there doctor as she led the way to Ryo's hospital room.
Ryou was carried... into Bikky's arms? Not only is that sentence constructed so that it sounds like they've just handed Ryou to Bikky, it wouldn't even make sense if it was grammatically correct. I know Bikky kind of shot up like a weed once he got into his teens, but I still don't think he's quite big enough to carry Ryou, especially not when Ryou's got so much extra weight on him.
... I can't even begin to count all the things wrong with that paragraph. Shall I just dump the whole vat of red ink on it?
"If you could wait out here we will begin the sea section." One of the nurses asked Bikky and Cal, pushing them gentle out of the room.
*rolls on the ground laughing* KawaiiJade, honey? It's C-section. You may think that looks lazy, (and pardon me for laughing hysterically at you if you do), but it's actually short for Caesarian section. Do you want to write all that out? Neither does anyone else. That's why it's called a C-section. It does not involve cutting a chunk out of the ocean.
Neeks said it best: "Ryou is giving birth to a DOLPHIN!" XD
Bikky struggled. "No I want to be there for my Dad. Is he going to be okay?"
The nurse didn't answer just continued to push Bikky out. Slamming the door shut Bikky and Cal were forced to go sit in front of the room. The blonde teenager was scared for his father and his new coming sister. He had been told that male pregnancy had a greater chance of not making it. Either the baby died and took the father with it or the father died leaving the helpless baby.
Attempt At Injecting Artificial Tension To Make Up For Shitty Storytelling: check.
You know, at no point has it ever been explained how Ryou's little assmiracle came to exist. It would be nice if we were actually told how it happened, and why the phenomenon seems to be widespread enough that Bikky can actually be told things about it.
...Wait, Bikky and Cal were forced to go sit in front of the room while they were slamming the door shut? KawaiiJade, writing is not a contest to see how many events you can jam into a short sentence.
*Dee*
"Come on Berkley we've caught the bad guy now let's go home." Dee protested.
Berkley glared at him. "You're right Dee we caught one bad guy. But there are many here. I'm sorry but I hate having to be here another month or two like you but we have a job to do."
WHY ARE THEY NOT LEAVING THIS TO THE FLORIDA POLICE? WHY ARE THEY EVEN HERE TO BEGIN WITH? PLEASE TELL ME THIS!
Sweet fishie fuck. It's illogical enough that Dee is there, but why is Berke there too? It's not like he's the commissioner of an entire precinct in New York, or anything.
...WHY ARE THEY IN FLORIDA?!
*Seven Hours after Ryo's Labor*
"I hope he's okay? Damn can we get any news?" growled Bikky. Cal sat next to her, leaning her head onto his lap.
I don't know, Bikky. Do you hope he's okay? You tell me.
Alternatively, KawaiiJade could remove that first question mark.
Then a nurse came into the hall. "Congratulations…Randy is okay. He's sleeping. You can see the baby if you like. Follow me." The female nurse showed Bikky and Cal to the room. The blonde automatically went to Ryo's side. Cal walked over to the baby and smiled. The nurse left the two a while ago.
You know something? Normally I have a high capacity to withstand awkward and nonsensical writing. A lot of incomprehensible sentences go unnoticed by me because I understood what the author meant to say.
I can't do that with this one. I'm left here futilely trying to decipher what KawaiiJade meant by "The nurse left the two a while ago". The sentence on its own is somewhat comprehensible, but in that paragraph it just doesn't gel.
"Aww…she's so cute." Smiled Cal. And as if on cue the baby opened her eyes to reveal emerald orbs shining up at her. "She's just like her father…" Bikky looked up at her. "…um…she looks like Dee."
Shining emerald orbs. Neeks, I think you're right - she's an ickle baby Mary Sue.
"It's too bad that Dee couldn't be here."
*Two Years later -Dee-*
WHAT?
Okay, this is just wrong. This man lives and works in New York. It is completely unreasonable and ridiculous to force him to randomly run off to solve a case in ANOTHER STATE, and especially so to make him stay there for TWO YEARS!
"COME ON PEOPLE I WANNA GO HOME!!" Dee yelled. He had been on this stupid undercover thing for a long time. He hadn't been able to reach Ryo like he said. "I'M NOT STAYING ANOTHER MINUTES HERE!!"
Even though I rather agree with Dee's sentiments, I must ask... who the fuck is he yelling at?
*Ryo, Bikky, Cal, and two year old Raven*
"I'm not cleaning that up." Stated Bikky, eyeing the pink vomit on the carpet, left by his younger sister.
You know, I didn't think too hard about that before, but pink vomit is probably not the number one sign of a healthy baby. Ryou might want to take
Ryo sighed. "Please I have to go to work. Cal will come back from the grocery store to help you take care of her."
Bikky nodded cleaning up the mess. When Ryo came back into the room he stopped at the doorway. Bikky sat Indian style on the floor with Raven standing on his lap. The ebony haired toddler pulled on Bikky's blonde locks. "Hey…" Bikky smiled as Raven took her pink in his hand. "…you know Cal's right you do look like Dee."
So what you're trying to say is that Raven Sue physically took the color pink from herself and put it in Bikky's hand.
Ryo backed away, resting against the wall. Bikky sighed. "Even though how much I hate it…I wish Dee was here. Yeah you would love him. He's tough and…" Bikky continued to chant about Dee.
Cue disturbing mental image of Bikky wearing robes and saying incantations over a bubbling cauldron, right about... now.
Ryo smiled. He knew Bikky and Dee had a special thing and now his blonde son was sharing it with his little sister. Ryo turned down towards the front door. "I wish Dee was here." He choked back a tear, pulling his jacket over his body. "I'm leaving Bikky."
"He knew Bikky and Dee had a special thing"...
I won't even say it. It hurts my mind too much to even ponder.
*Two Years Later Raven's 4th Birthday*
"Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to Raven…happy birthday to you."
Everyone clapped as the long haired four year old blew out her candles. "Here Raven…I got this for you. Hope you like it." Cal handed the girl a pink box.
The young girl's eyes grew big as she held up the white tank dress with sunflowers on it. "Dad look what Cal gave me." She smiled facing Ryo.
"Wow that's beautiful."
Please note - we must constantly describe what Raven looks like, what she got for a birthday present, and the color of the box it was in. This is just about more description than we've gotten in the entire rest of the fic. Because Raven Sue is SPECHUL.
"Can I put it on?" she asked.
Ryo loved the look in his daughter's eyes. They were filled with love and happiness. Only if Ryo could feel the same way. Dee, his Dee had been gone for four years. He missed everything. Ryo's, pregnancy, Raven being born, he first words, her first steps, Dee had missed the first of everything. If Ryo had heard from Dee since he left is spirits would be brightened a little but he hadn't so they just sunk down low.
OMG! Look! COMMAS! I was beginning to think they were an extinct species! But they're in all the wrong places.
And this paragraph might actually almost be touching, if it were better written and if there were any good flipping reason at all for Dee to have been away for four years IN FLORIDA.
"Maybe later."
"Okay." She put the dress back. Cal sat in Bikky's arms, a diamond engagement ring on her finger. Bikky had proposed to her just three weeks ago. Ryo was happy for the two. He knew it would happen sooner or later but the surprise was still overwhelming.
Ryou: I knew you two were eventually gonna shack up, but I'm just overwhelmed with surprise that you're ENGAGED!
I don't think 'surprise' is the word we should use there.
Then suddenly the hone rang. "I'll get it." Ryo offered already reaching for the phone. "Just keep opening your presents Raven."
The little girl nodded as her father entered the other room to take the call. "Hello?"
A sigh. "Oh God it's good to hear your voice again Ryo."
Ryo almost dropped the phone from the familiar voice on the other line. "Dee? Oh God are you okay? Where are you? Oh I've missed you so much…when are you coming home?"
A slight chuckle. "Calm down baby. I'm in Boston. My flight is coming in tomorrow."
"Oh God Dee you're…" Ryo couldn't finish the sentence to shocked and happy.
I'm not sure I can finish the fic to pained and angry.
"That's right Ryo baby. I'm coming home."
Okay! How much do y'all wanna bet that when Dee comes back home next chapter, everything will be fine, his relationship with Ryou will be fully intact, Raven will accept him without a fuss, and it'll be just like he never even left? Even though he's been away from home and out of contact with the family for four years? Gaaahh.
KJ: Sorry for the long wait I really do. I've been real busy but not too busy for my fans. They're what's important right? Hope you liked this chapter enough to review it. Hope you look for the next chapter. And I promise that it won't take this long. Ja'ne!!
Let's the speaking Engrish! Let's the reviewbeg and egomasturbate for big happy!
How long did this chapter take, a week? If people are seriously complaining about the wait between chapters, I am absolutely flabbergasted. If anything, KawaiiJade should be apologizing for chucking her story at us so soon. It could have done with an extra, say, year or five; either for planning, or to get KawaiiJade time to grow up a bit and learn a bit about how to write.
At this point, I pray for nothing more than the swift end of this fic.