fuyu: (grammar whore away!)
Lyssie ([personal profile] fuyu) wrote2006-03-23 10:45 pm

(no subject)

Dear College/University Students, or Alternately, Anyone Over The Age Of Ten:

Please, for the love of sweet merciful Buddhafish, please, PLEASE type like you have any fucking idea what composes a word.

The pronoun "I" is capitalized. "Kewl" is no longer a cute or current slang word.

Apostrophes are IMPORTANT. "Dont" is not a word. It is letter vomit. "Aint" makes you sound like you're struggling to say "ant".

Commas are also important.

YOU ONLY EVER NEED ONE FUCKING EXCLAMATION POINT.

"Couldn't have". Never, EVER "couldn't of". (Or couldnt. See above point about letter vomit.)

I love you all, seriously, but? YOU ARE FUCKING MURDERING THE LANGUAGE. Some of us LIKE our English intact. LANGUAGE IS THE BASIS OF SOCIETY. PLEASE DO NOT UNDERMINE THIS. I ENJOY BEING ABLE TO COMMUNICATE.

You are in college. You should know better.

(Anyone younger: Please learn better before you become another college student who doesn't.)

Otherwise perfectly willing to get along with you,
Lyssie ♥

[identity profile] elanor-pam.livejournal.com 2006-03-25 12:00 am (UTC)(link)
You see, commas are holy, mysterious beings that manifest only to the initiated. To receive the power of the Comma, you need to study and accept the word of the Holy Grammar as the one truth, and follow It and cherish It in every waking moment of your life.

*glows like HOLY*

[identity profile] elanor-pam.livejournal.com 2006-03-25 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
VICTOLY IS MINE! *poses to the fanfare*